4. Shitty research

Did God really just say that the bible is a bunch of bullshit? Oh well, it’s still one of my best resources for his past, so I’ll stick by my policy: Bad research is better than no research.

“Okay, Jeff. Here’s another question. The whole Adam and Eve thing. You kicked them out of Eden just for eating an apple. Seriously? You don’t think that was a little excessive?”

“Paul, you’ve been reading your Elvis bible, haven’t you? Let me tell you how it really happened.”